потопчемся по женщинам ещё и на американском материале

[maryxmas]

пришло по рассылке для американских славистов.
хуже всего то, что дама, это приславшая, пишет:

What follows is an extraordinarily apt description of language use among
American females when talking to males. It was, of course, designed to be
funny, and indeed it is. But, the question is, is there a similar set of
terms used by Russian women in comparable situations? What are they?

----------------------------------

Words that Women Use:

FINE:
This is the word women use to end an argument when they feel they are
right and you need to shut up. Never use "fine" to describe how a
woman looks - this will cause you to have one of those arguments.

FIVE MINUTES:
This is half an hour. It is equivalent to the five minutes that your
football game is going to last before you take out the trash, so it's an
even trade


NOTHING:
This means "something," and you should be on your toes. "Nothing" is
usually used to describe the feeling a woman has of wanting to turn you
inside out, upside down, and backwards. "Nothing" usually signifies an
argument that will last "Five Minutes" and end with "Fine"

GO AHEAD: ( With Raised Eyebrows! ) This is a dare. One that will result
in a woman getting upset over "Nothing" and will end with the word
"Fine"

GO AHEAD: (Normal Eyebrows) This means "I give up" or "do what you want
because I don't care". You will get a "Raised Eyebrow Go Ahead" in just
a few minutes, followed by "Nothing" and "Fine" and she will talk to
you in about "Five Minutes" when she cools off.

LOUD SIGH: This is not actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement
often misunderstood by men. A "Loud Sigh" means she thinks you are an
idiot at that moment, and wonders why she is wasting her time standing
here and arguing with you over "Nothing".

SOFT SIGH: Again, not a word, but a non-verbal statement. "Soft Sighs"
mean that she is content. Your best bet is to not move or breathe, and
she will stay content.

THAT'S OKAY: This is one of the most dangerous statements that a woman
can make to a man. "That's Okay" means that she wants to think long and
hard before paying you back for whatever it is that you have done.
"That's Okay" is often used with the word "Fine" and in conjunction with
a "Raised Eyebrow."

GO AHEAD! : At some point in the near future, you are going to be in
some mighty big trouble.

PLEASE DO: This is not a statement, it is an offer. A woman is giving
you the chance to come up with whatever excuse or reason you have for
doing whatever it is that you have done. You have a fair chance with the
truth, so be careful and you shouldn't get a "That's Okay"

THANKS: A woman is thanking you. Do not faint. Just say you're welcome.


THANKS A LOT: This is much different from "Thanks." A woman will say,
"Thanks A Lot" when she is really ticked off at you. It signifies that
you have offended her in some callous way, and will be followed by the
"Loud Sigh." Be careful not to ask what is wrong after the "Loud Sigh,"
as she will only tell you "Nothing"

Comments

вот уже 7 лет живу в америке

[kor-ol.livejournal.com]

и могу по этому поводу сказать, что все вышеперечисленное с равным успехом используют и американские мужчины :)) А насчет Fine, так это все враки, мои подруги в таких случая говорят shut the f.. up, I am right and you are worng! :)))

Re: вот уже 7 лет живу в америке

[maryxmas.livejournal.com]

ни за что в жизни не позволила бы себе такое сказать :(((

Да я в общем тоже

[kor-ol.livejournal.com]

такое могу сказать, только если уж очень разозлюсь, а потом сижу и переживаю. Самое большее на что меня может хватить, это заявить "Ты неправ(а)" и гордо удалиться...

Re: Да я в общем тоже

[maryxmas.livejournal.com]

не могу не согласиться :)
та же фигня.